I don’t understand…

…people who say they won’t go to parties or events outside Dallas or outside Fort Worth, as if there’s some forcefield running down the middle of the metroplex with special cootie contaminators just waiting to attack people from the Other city. I haven’t understood it since I’ve been here, and I don’t think I ever will. It just seems so limiting. These are two very different cities. Each is distinct. Each has special things to offer. Personally, I like elements of each, and one of the reasons we live between them is that this way we didn’t have to choose.

I don’t remember this kind of divisiveness in California. I’m sure it happened. I know there are jokes that there’s a battle between L.A. and San Francisco that only the folks in SFO seem to know about, but there’s a difference of about six hours between SFO and L.A., whereas Dallas and Fort Worth, whether the residents of either care to admit it or not, are part of one overlapping urban sprawl.

For much of my life, I lived in San Jose, which is roughly an hour away from San Francisco. Like both Dallas and Fort Worth, it is a city in its own right. It has theatre, music, restaurants, movies, it’s own neighborhoods and suburbs, and it is also part of the massive urban and suburban sprawl that is Silicon Valley. But I’ve never encountered any of my friends complaining that they won’t go to a party or event because it’s in San Francisco (or, for that matter, Oakland, Berkeley, Sunnyvale, or Palo Alto (well, perhaps parts of Oakland)).

This isn’t a judgment thing. And it has nothing to do with special circumstances. I understand that there are people who CANNOT go much further than their own neighborhoods for various reasons. But for those who can, to refuse? I don’t get it. I honestly don’t get it.

Someone please explain it to me?

CC BY-NC-ND 4.0 I don’t understand… by Melissa Bartell is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

9 thoughts on “I don’t understand…

  1. Oh, believe me, that goes on a LOT here. Mostly it’s people who won’t leave San Francisco to go anywhere else. Drives me up a wall. Like they can’t be bothered to cross The Big Water. They expect everyone to come to them.

  2. I lived in Duncanville about 30-32 years ago, and it wasn’t much different back then. It’s almost like Dallas has this collective ego about itself, and nothing else worthwhile exists outside of it.

  3. When I was in Dallas in November I scooted around a bit so that I could visit friends, in Bedford and Plano and Richardson and one other community near Plano (I can’t quite recall) and people were really shocked that I’d drive all over like that. I couldn’t imagine what they were on about.

    But we have that sort of provincial thinking in Pittsburgh too, especially amongst suburbanites who get very used to staying in their own little enclaves. I’ve never understood it. I like going to different places.

  4. It’s funny, isn’t it? I know a lot of people who simply won’t, which was one reason my group missed the NaNo TGIO. No one wanted to come with. (Well, that and me having out of town guests that weekend. ;-) ).

    Maybe it’s reverse snobbery? Like, Fort Worth has been called worthless by Dallasites so many times, the Fort Worthians are no longer willing to take the plunge? I’ve been the recipient of such snubs on occasion (the belief that FW is nothing but cows and hicks with nothing worthy to do), and it’s pretty annoying.

    Personally, I enjoy the occasional trip to Dallas — obscure movies at the Angelica, an art show, good restaurants, comedy shows, concerts… But, I will say, I hate driving in Dallas.

    It is so weird! There is this point between the two cities where, on the FW side, people will let you in instead of cutting you off, and then you pass that point onto the Dallas side, and the aggression factor goes sky high. Not that Dallas drivers will never let you in, but it happens a lot less. Add that to the crazy intersections, the roads that I don’t know (that part is my fault), and the difficult-to-find parking, and if I’m going to Dallas, I either want to take the train or ride in someone else’s car. Then again, I don’t like to drive anyway, so maybe this is not surprising. ;-)

  5. I was reading this and thinking, “yeah, you’re right, except for Oakland.” and then you wrote, “except for parts of Oakland.”

    My mother lives in Cincinnati and there is a divide between east and west there.

  6. Personally I wouldn’t mind visiting Dallas more often. My mom wouldn’t want to drive me, though, and she’d consider it too far to drive, as well as the traffic. I’d take a train, but then I’d have to figure out the Dart system over there. If they have a website (which they probably do) and I’m suitably motivated I might just do it one day.

    I can’t believe some people didn’t go to the TGIO just because of its location. It wasn’t that far! Weird people. I think it was actually closer to FtW. Funny, I’m now part of that group of people who thought it was too far. heh. Maybe I can try to talk them into it next year? ;)

Comments are closed.