I spent Mother’s Day weekend with my mother, though her arrival on this specific weekend was coincidental. She’s working for a company that does loans in Mexico, and their primary market are gringos who want vacation property, or ex-pats who want to put down deeper roots. She’s been travelling all over Mexico corralling the brokers and whipping them into shape, and last week she had to pay a visit to the home office in Houston.

We flew her up here on Southwest, expecting her to arrive at 7 AM Friday. Instead, she arrived at 9 PM Thursday, and we were late picking her up because we both were delayed at work, we’d never been to Love Field (we’ve passed it, but not gone in), and we were stuck waiting for the world’s slowest moving freight train (which, okay, was going down the streets of Dallas, so had a reason to be slow, I guess) to pass. Still, we found her, fed her, and put her to bed.

So why is this entry called “Learning Curve” and not “Weekend with Mama?” Because bits of it were very educational. Here’s what I learned:

1) Do not attempt to drive from Irving/Las Colinas to Love Field in under an hour, even at 8:30 PM. The traffic isn’t so bad, but the trains will completely mess up your schedule.

2) Always bring a sweater for your mother, who will complain she is cold in 75-degree evening weather because, “I live in Baja, where it’s warm” and then turn around 24 hours later and complain that “Mexico never gets this hot” (90 degrees in summer).

3) Sit next to your mother, not across from her, so that when she puts her feet on the seat opposite her, you do not get kicked.

4) There is such a thing as too much shopping. Spending an entire weekend re-building a wardrobe for someone is less than fun, though there were moments, and Dress Barn does not have chairs for bored shopping companions.

5) Never, ever, under any circumstances, enter a bath store on the night before Mother’s Day, as you will get trampled to (near) death by shoppers who are apparently just finding out they need to buy a gift for mom.

6) Do not expect actual service in stores like Kohls.

7) Take a day off after the visit, to recuperate. I didn’t,. and was dog-tired all day yesterday.

The first one arrived on Sunday.
I’d been reading on the patio while eating lunch (liverwurst and cream cheese on rye, if you must know), and I needed to take a restroom break. I’d already crossed that space of floor several times over the preceeding two hours, and there had been nothing strange or dangerous about it, then. No obstacles were there to block my path, save the two dogs who are my near-constant escorts when I am home (they like to dance canine circles around my feet as I walk).
I looked down, and froze.
“Fuzzy,” I yelled. “Miss Cleo did something bad.”

I don’t know why I assumed the culprit was Cleo. Perhaps because the thing on the floor was larger than Zorro’s head? Perhaps because he’s never shown interest in any animal that wasn’t a member of the family rodentia? In any case, her usual game of “chase the birds and try not to fall in the pool” made Cleo the obvious scapegoat.

“What is it?” he asked. “Did she pee on the floor?”
“No.” Could he not hear the tremulous note in my voice?
“Did she leave presents?” (Our euphamism for more solid doggie deposits)
“Not the way you mean,” I said. “Come here. Bring the dust pan.”
“Why?”

And so I told him, “Miss Cleo murdered a bird.”

Except we’re not so sure she did, because the corpse formerly inhabited by the soul of a robin had no marks that pointed to being a canine chewtoy. It was, simply, dead. As if it had dropped there for no apparent reason. Neither dog showed any interest in the ex-creature.

Then last night – or early this morning – another arrival. The dessicated husk of a gecko that had been lying on the edge of the patio was deposited in the same spot. This is odd, as it was not there when Fuzzy escorted the dogs to bed after their evening consitutional, and they were not let out again til morning, at which time the object was spied. (He carried it outside to the garden).

I told Fuzzy we must have a feline poltergeist, as I know Cleo isn’t fast enough to catch a gecko.

Personality type: High Maintenance

You pride yourself on being assertive and direct; everyone else thinks you’re bossy and arrogant. You’re constantly running your mouth about topics that only you would find interesting. Your capacity for wasting other people’s time is limitless. Your friends find you intolerable, that’s why they’re plotting to kill you.

Also drinks: Water. Bottled, chilled, with four ice cubes, a twist of lemon, in a crystal glass.
Can also be found at: Trendy martini bars

Drink entered: Triple venti no vanilla extra caramel caramel macchiato.

Dallandra @ Open Diary made me do this. YOU can try it here.

(And the scary thing is, this is true…sometimes.)

I hated dusting that dresser. It was an intricate task of moving the trays onto the rolltop desk in the corner, dusting the back part of the dresser, moving the trays back, dusting the front, and then dusting the scrollwork of the mirror frame.

That mirror held many mysteries. So old that the corners had blackened, it seemed to reflect what people should look like, more than what they did. In that mirror, my grandmother’s olive skin was that of a girl, not an elderly woman, and her wrinkles softened to smile lines. Her eyes seemed to sparkle more, when we stood side by side in front of it, and she’d pick up various items, and tell me their stories.

About once a summer, we dove into the bottom drawer, where she kept the jewelry that was out of season (out of favor, we joked behind her back) or too fragile to wear – a cameo pin from Italy, worn by her grandmother, a necklace made of polished nuggets of lava and shells from Hawaii, a circle pin, leftover from when circle pins were trendy, a silver box full of old foreign coins, emptied from my grandfather’s pockets when he’d come home from his last tour of duty, and love letters he’d written over the years – including a series which included detailed instructions (never followed) on how to draw plants.

My favorite trinket from the bottom of the drawer, though, was a slighly pink crystal necklace and matching earrings. Allowed to try it on, I would prance around my grandmother’s bedroom acting the part of a princess, and practicing my regal wave (touch the crystals, lift my hand and gesture as if screwing in a lightbulb), and my best curtsey. My grandmother would watch me, smiling fondly, and commenting on how the stones sparkled in the light coming in the window.

“How it shines,” she said.

Sometimes I wonder if she meant something other than the crystal.

Comment on this entry and I will give you a letter. Write five words beginning with that letter in your journal, including an explanation of what the word means to you and why, and then pass out letters to those who want to play along.

Stolen from Sara-Halfelven at LiveJournal, who gave me the letter N.

Notebooks: Spiral bound, preferably at the top, college ruled, with green lines preferred over blue – those are my favorite notebooks. For as long as I’ve known how to form letters on paper, I’ve liked to have several sheets stacked beneath the point of my pen (I’m so not a pencil person) and I don’t like using both sides, unless forced. I know, I know, bad for the environment, but there you have it. In various boxes and shelves around my house I have notebooks dating back years, decades, filled with bad doodles (because I cannot draw) and half written stories, as well as any number of other notes. Sometimes, my choice of notebook is more sophisticated than the spiral bound sort – I bought a Moleskine a few months ago – but the problem with such things is that I feel like the writing in it has to be good, and first impressions, first drafts, rarely are. At other times, I use the technological solution, like now – sitting in bed typing all this on a notebook computer.

Normal: The word normal always feels very bland to me – it’s like those model homes where all the walls are off-white and all the carpets are cream, and they have them furnished with generic stuff from the Cort catalogue. While I understand that one must make some concessions to society’s norms in order to function in the real world, this sense of beigeness has made “normal” something I’ve never aspired to be. Give me my eccentricities, my quirks, my accent that is a total blend of every place I’ve ever lived for extensive amounts of time (New Jersey, Colorado, California, SoDak, Texas) and every person I’ve ever spoken to (especially if I liked their speech patterns). Let me revel in the fact that I’m just as happy child-free as I would be if I wasn’t, and don’t bug me about the way I pick and choose elements of various religions and make them work for me, about the stacks of books in the bathroom, the bedroom, my office, all in different genres, or the fact that I’m just not comfortable in large groups of people, and wil probably never be able to go to bed before one AM more than two nights in a row. Normal=average=boring.

Night: I’ve been fairly nocturnal since dirt, really. As a child, I would read under the covers long into the night, sometimes falling asleep, only to awake hours later with the lights on and my book open across my chest. The darkness wakes my mind, and sets it racing with stories, words, music, ideas. It is cool, soothing, and mysterious. It allows the watching of stars, the comfort of moonlight, and the chorus of critters I know I’d rather not see, but quite enjoy hearing. Oh, I like sunshine (no, really), and I go through phases of being a morning person, but I was born at three in the afternoon on a hot August day, and I think that caused an affinity for night time.

Nookie: Fuzzy was in the car with me, on the way to Cedar Hill the other day, when I said I’d committed to writing about five things that began with N and what they mean to me. He immediately mentioned nuzzling and necking, and I added nooners, and then said I might as well just write about nookie. Now, while nookie can mean the whole sex act, for me it means playful enounters, the kind that happen in stolen moments when you should be doing something else – like right after a shower, when you KNOW you need to leave for work in fifteen minutes, or when your parents are visiting and they’re watching television in the next room. That sort of thing. It’s a combination of frolic and a little bit of the illicit. And yes, there can still be nookie when you’ve been married for eleven years.

Neighborhood: While I don’t generally interact much with my actual neighbors, I like that our neighborhood is one in which people are generally aware of who belongs and who doesn’t, when it comes to the odd car parked on the street, or people approaching other people’s houses. More than the immediate though, neighborhoods for me are like small towns. My favorite neighborhoods, ever, are Willow Glen and the Rosegarden, both in San Jose, CA, but I like the Richmond district in San Francisco, too, and truly, I like my suburban neighborhood of Westchester, in Grand Prairie, TX, as much for the mature trees as for the fact that we have a couple of grocery stores, a cafe, Home Depot, Target, and a few neat restaurants, as well as a matching pair of movie theatres, all within a mile. As I told my mother on the phone yesterday, if you have to drive more than fifteen minutes to buy milk and toilet paper, you live too far from civilization. Also, I like that I live in a very dog-friendly neighborhood – almost every morning and evening you’ll see people taking their pets out for a stroll, and when the weather’s good, the kids and dogs play in the park, or there will be a congregation of kids and dogs on one of the corners, some on bikes, some with skateboards, others just walking. I like that our streets are safe enough, traffic-wise, for such things. I like that I feel at home here – we looked at other areas and they felt sterile, because there was no sense of neighborhood.

Friday Five memes have been around almost since dirt. Or at least since blogging began. I’m not feeling meme-ish tonight, as much as list-y, so I offer what I hope will be a new tradition here: Happy Friday – Five Things That Made Me Smile Today. (As always, participation is welcome but not obligatory).

1. The Dawn Chorus: Around 5:30 this morning, as I left the car to run into the local convenience store to use the ATM, I was greeted by a chorus of birds so loud and so beautiful that for a moment I was transfixed. Most of them were grackles, of course, but there were other voices in there as well – finches, jays, and even an owl – it was an amazing way to start the morning.
2. The Overpass on Loop 12: There’s a stretch of road on loop 12 (or spur 408 – I’m never awake to pay attention) that is built on a very tall overpass that always reminds me of a Harry Potter-esque train trestle, except that it’s made of concrete, not brick or stone, and it’s part of a multilever interchange…still on foggy or misty mornings, driving across it feels like driving on a road through the clouds. It’s good to have a tiny bit of magic every day.
3. Synchronicity: We heard the same song in the same place on the road going TO work this morning, as we did coming home.
4. Kava: I added some to cranberry juice last night, and managed not only to fall asleep before eleven (a crucial thing when one plans to be at work by six) but to have restful sleep. Tonight, I added a half dose to more juice, because I’m loopy from lack of sleep and an intense day, but wired, and since I don’t want to be bouncing off the walls…well you get the idea. No, I’m not using it every night. Yes, I’m aware that there can be side effects.
5. Piles of Pillows: I’m surrounded by dogs and pillows just now, and it’s exactly where I need to be. Not the most exciting Friday night, perhaps, but I’ve always preferred cozy comfort to chaos or the club scene, anyway.

First, I want to thank a couple of well-meaning readers who suggested my headache issues are henna related. I may have posted about it all in one entry, but that’s because I’ve simply not had time to write much lately, not because there was any relation other than my love of alliteration.

I’ve been suffering from nausea-inducing headaches on and off since last summer. I thought they were sinus related, but lately they’ve been getting worse, so I’ve been analyzing, and consulting, and have concluded that a) they’re not sinus; b) they’re migraine; and c)they’re worse whenever I’ve ingested anything with aspartame or MSG. I’ve been really careful about avoiding both substances, since coming to this conclusion, and am having fewer headaches. Within the next week or two, I’ll be doing a seven-day quasi macrobiotic diet (I’m not cutting out coffee because that would be too cruel to the people I have to interact with), just to really detox, and I’ll take it from there. While I know that there are migraine drugs available, I’m really not that keen on being dependent on any chemical (except caffeine).

(In truth, even my caffeine addiction is a bit of an exaggeration. I CAN go without coffee if I have to, I just don’t like to.)

The only reaction I had due to the henna paste was the psychological need to wash my hands as soon as it was on. And a lot of cool reactions to the seahorse, which is now fading.

In other news, I’m enjoying the first half of series five of My Family on BBC America, as part of a lazy day of lounging and reading.

I spent the afternoon at Salon Worx having a manicure and pedicure. Despite suggestions, I opted for a sheersheersheer pink on my fingers (so that when it chips off in a day, as it inevitably will, it won’t show, and because I have small hands, so bold colors dwarf them further), and a sort of salmony pink OPI color called “Love Me Tender” on my toes, that would be insipid except it has subtle coppery glitter in it, so it shimmers, and it’s one of those shades that makes skin look tanner than it really is, and THAT, is never a bad thing.

Fuzzy met me when I was done, and we went to lunch at RockFish, partly because I wanted clam chowder, but mostly because it’s in the same parking lot as the salon. I had the Pacific snapper, and Fuzzy, who doesn’t like fish to taste fishy, had the cedar plank salmon, and we were both very happy.

From there, we stopped in at the local health food store, where I bought Ezekiel bread (which comes in Cinnamon Raisin – who knew?), Q10, and Kava, the latter of which I mixed with cranberry juice rather than water, because the taste of it in water is not unlike raw sewage. Or at least…the way that I imagine raw sewage might taste. Kava is helpful in relieving migraines AND menstrual cramps, and since I’m having both just now, I decided to try it. Four hours later, I’m pleasantly relaxed, a bit sleepy, and just woozy enough that I will not be shaving my legs til morning.

When we got home, I announced that I was going to nap while Fuzzy went grocery shopping, but instead I threw towels in the washer (We were out of clean washclothes. A tragedy.) and was suddenly inspired to clean all my makeup brushes, though the inspiration came in the form of the new makeup I brought home from the salon. My colors of the moment are “sunset” which is a warm brown, and “lemon spice” which is a pale neutral yellow perfect for the brow arch.

Fuzzy brought me flowers along with the groceries. He’s so sweet. And, yeah, I asked him to, but he had to remember, and choose a bouquet that I’d like. Go Fuzzy! Keep this up and I’ll forgive you for being right about the Mix 102.9 ear worm on Friday morning.

After the cold stuff was put away, we went to Blockbuster to use the April coupons, and then, because it was nearly nine and I hadn’t had ANY COFFEE ALL DAY, to Starbucks.

So, no Faire this weekend because Fuzzy’s on call, but a nice Saturday even so, and tomorrow after church, I might finally get brave enough to takle the flower box in the back yard. (I want it to look good but I’m terrified about what might be living in, on, or under it.)

I’m babbled out, and really muzzy, so it seems a good time to end this, and go curl up in bed with a book, and my dogs.

Happy Saturday!

Friday Five memes have been around almost since dirt. Or at least since blogging began. I’m not feeling meme-ish tonight, as much as list-y, so I offer what I hope will be a new tradition here: Happy Friday – Five Things That Made Me Smile Today. (As always, participation is welcome but not obligatory).

1. Picnic Basket: So, as I was walking along the corridor to the cafeteria today, there was a row of tables with interesting things and sheets of paper, which, once I was closer, I learned comprised a silent auction to benefit the March of Dimes. There was a basket of amazing candles, and there was a cheery yellow picnic basket stuffed with a beach towel, and two placesettings of neat picnicware. The color made me grin, so I bid on both, skipping merrily past the logo wear and mp3 players. I then went inside and got a freshly made cheesesteak sandwich and a huge fruit salad, and carried both back to my desk in the other building, because it’s month-end, and we were all working like insane ppl so we wouldn’t be called in tomorrow. Ten minutes later, I was informed I’d won the picnic basket with my $35 bid (an $80 value), so I trekked back across the building, down the stairs, across the breezeway, down the hall, and exchanged a pretty purple check for the basket…then got to carry it back through the halls while people stopped me and looked in it, and wanted to know where I got it, etc.
2. Freedom: I do NOT have to work tomorrow. This may not seem like much, but it’s been something I’ve been threatened with all month.
3. GirlStuff: I am spending tomorrow afternoon at the salon having a froufrou manicure and pedicure. Nail polish color suggestions are hereby requested. I tend to keep my fingers pale and go nuts with my toes.
4. Words, Words, Words: We went to the bookstore on the way to dinner after work the other night, so I have new stuff to read, including this really interesting novel that takes place in the Aleutian Islands…I can feel the wind and smell the salty air as I read.
5. Addictions: Green tea frappucinos laced with blackberry syrup and lemon pound cake are a lovely snack around four-thirty in the afternoon. I may be cooped up in an office, in body, but that combination puts my imagination in a sidewalk cafe.

Friday Five memes have been around almost since dirt. Or at least since blogging began. I’m not feeling meme-ish tonight, as much as list-y, so I offer what I hope will be a new tradition here: Happy Friday – Five Things That Made Me Smile Today. (I’ve been whining so much lately, it was time to kick myself in the pants, anyway).

1. Green tea lattes: it should be no surprise that I’m starting with a $tarbucks product, but the fact that I’ve switched from jolty coffee to calmer (but still caffeinated) green tea may surprise some. I needed to ease into the morning, today, and this worked wonders. (As I write this, I’m drinking another, because it’s gentle enough to send me into sleep, really. It’s such a comforting flavor, too. Just enough sweet, just enough bitter, a little earthy, and I love the color…
2. My coworkers. At previous jobs I returned from being sick with lists of things to catch up on, and half-done projects being returned to me. Today, I arrived after a day and a half of sleeping off a mild (thankfully) flu , to find one of my teammates on the phone with one of my brokers. “She’s back today,” she said into the phone, but staring at me. “And she shouldn’t be. She should be resting. But since I’ve got your file almost closed, I’m going to finish it.” When I asked her, afterward, if she wanted the closing credit she said, “No. You did most of the work. Don’t be silly.” Later, our supervisor told me that if I just come in at nine instead of ten three days next week, I won’t have to use TWO sick days (since we can’t break them in halves), and then said, “[Manager] said you were frustrated at the amount of fallout you’ve had this month. Don’t worry. SOme months are like that. Today, we’ll give you as many files as you can take, so that you can rebuild your pipeline.” I love that these women are so supportive. Tomorrow, many of us are going to Scarborough Faire and while we’re going separately, there are plans to meet for peach bellinis at some point. I’ve never had coworkers I was remotely interested in hanging out with, before. (Not including TechnoCowboy who was a friend FIRST.)
3. New traditions. Over the last few weeks, in trying to find ways to make the Lenten “fish on Friday” ritual a bit easier for both of us (it is possible to get sick of salmon and tilapia, really), we’ve begun having Friday night sushi at a place in Irving called. Hanasho, which, for some reason, I keep wanting to call “Hanosha.” Yeah, I’m weird that way. In any case, the service is excellent, the sashimi is fresh, and they do an unagi donburi that is literally an entire barbecued eel over a bed of rice served on a rectangular glass dish (that is oddly reminiscent of an ashtray) for about $13. The best part though? The smoking section is in the way back behind a wall, so as not to taint the fish. As we were leaving today, I told Fuzzy I’d like to make eating there a Friday tradition even after Easter.
4. An actual lunch hour. For the first time since January, we were all caught up enough that we got to take an entire hour for lunch, which meant one of my workmates and I ate IN the cafeteria for the first time since it opened, instead of merely buying food and carting it back upstairs.
5. Not procrastinating. While many of our friends, family members and colleagues are glued to their computer screens this weekend, finishing (or starting) their tax returns, we’ve been finished since the end of January, when we received our w-2’s. And while we didn’t quite come out at zero (my goal), at least we didn’t owe this year. I think I”m entitled to a little smugness over that one.

As I said, this isn’t really a meme, but anyone who feels moved to share things that made them smile today, either here or in their own space, is more than welcome.